Twisted Tales
by The Anonymous Name
Summary: All sorts of bizarre Fairy Tales combined to become a story of a girl - apprenticed to an 'evil' fairy godmother- and a young Prince desperate to prove himself by climbing a Beanstalk.  And don't forget an angry Princess called Snow White bent on revenge.
1. Chapter 1

A boy and a woman sit across each other on a large and spacious bed. One a Prince and the other a Queen. The boy looks around five or so. He resembles the woman. And the woman - is young and beautiful. Her skin is unusually fair and flawless - as though she's never stepped out in the sun her entire life. And she is dressed eccentrically. She wears a black cloak which covers ALL her skin, and in her hand holds a ludicrously thick book. A book about a Prince and a Princess. A book with a happy ending.

"And they lived... happily ever after?" The woman exclaims in disgust, slamming the book shut with a thud. "Happily ever after? Nonsense I assure you!"

The boy doesn't understand what his Mother is so worked up for.

"What do you mean, Mother?" He questions naively. "The Prince married the Princess..."

"So?" The woman snaps. "So what?"

The boy is confused. "So... is that not a happy ending?"

The woman is impatient to impart this notion to her son. "In reality," She scowls. "There is no happy _ending_, My Son."

"No," The boy immediately disagrees. "That is not true!"

"As long as you are alive, your story continues. No, it does not end there."

"Mother-"

"Listen to me!" The woman pushes the boy's faces over so that it faces her. "Life always ends with death! That is the ending for every one of us. Everything, My Son, ends tragically."

The boys eyes widen in horror upon hearing his Mother declaring such a dreadful reality. Yes, death. Even at a tender age, he had been always aware of its menacing presence lurking in his life. But... Mother didn't have to raise up that topic again... What is she trying to prove? What is she doing?

Seeing her son's sheer look of terror, the Beautiful Lady realizes what she has done. She immediately regrets her outburst. Had she lost control of herself? Why shove forward to harsh realities of life into her son's perfect world?

"I am sorry, My Son," She whispers remorsefully. "Forgive my words..."

Her son just stares at her, dumbfounded.

"Anyway," The lady changes the topic uncomfortably. "You should take your bath. You smell like cockroach dung."

The boy decides to help shatter the silence between them. No point dwelling in the past, anyhow.

"I took my bath already, Mother," The boy replies obediently. He doesn't understand why his Mother always accuses him and his Father of smelling like cockroach dung. He was a very clean child, and Father was a clean man. So why did they always stink to her?

The lady blinks. Once. Then twice. Then she hesitates, looking rather sheepish.

"Oh... forgive me. Then it must be just me," The lady says - attempting to smile, but it comes out as a grimace.

The boy nods again. His Mother is acting strangely today.

The lady stands to her feet and heads to the door. There is a sad look on her face. Her son doesn't understand her behavior at all. He isn't meant to at the moment. Only when he's older, will he. That is such of the way of life.

Most Mothers would kiss their son goodnight. Most Mother would tell their son they love him. But she doesn't. Instead, she cries softly.

"Life is unfair, My Son," She chokes, before disappearing from sight.

Ten years later, The Prince finds out that his Mother, The Queen, is actually a Witch.

* * *

><p><strong>Twisted Tales<strong>

**~Chapter 1: A Giant's Beans?~**

**JACK'S POV**

"Prince Jackildophil," The Knight dipped his head in respect. "Please enter."

I nodded back curtly, before heading on into the largest and most grandeur chamber ever constructed in the universe.

My Father, The King, was seated upright on his majestic throne, scanning me solemnly - just as one would scrutinize a new horse. His frigid eyes seemed to pick out everything about me. My strengths, my weaknesses, my fears, my... Well, basically, he seemed to be accessing me.

I was used to being judged. By my people, by the ministers, by my servants, by anyone and everyone. It came with the 'Crown Prince' title. There was a price to pay for everything. So I followed through with my usual practiced mask. I simply forced my features to remain impartial as I held his overbearing gaze boldly. I musn't drop it. It was a sign of weakness.

"You have grown into a... handsome young man," The King finally spoke.

It was true he hadn't summoned me in two years already, but I really _wasn't_ expecting that.

I bowed. "You flatter me, Father."

"Aye," The King continued. "And you are..." His dark eyes darted to my face once more. "Eighteen years of age?"

"Seventeen," I finally corrected. "I am to turn Eighteen in eight days."

"I see..." The King sighed wearily. "Then I assume you know the reason you have been summoned?"

I nodded. I had been prepared for this since I could crawl around on fours. The countless of _mind-cracking_ 'History' lessons, the incessant _bone-cracking_ fencing lessons... They weren't coincidental. But to prepare me - to prepare me for this day.

"Which is?" The King asked testily.

"To prove myself worthy of the crown," I recited evenly. "It _is_ family tradition."

"Go on."

All this information had been drilled into my head since I was an infant. I was basically a walking-talking dictionary. If Father was testing my knowledge, I had to make a good impression of myself.

"I am to find a set of Giant's Beans which lead to a Giant's lair - and to steal from that Giant - and return safely."

"Excellent," The King commended me. He stared at me thoughtfully for a long moment. "Ah... What do you know of this family tradition of ours?"

Oh damn. He had caught me! The tutor simply hadn't enlightened me on that particular subject. Perhaps he hadn't known either?

"I know not, Father."

The King furrowed his brows upon this. I could never tell what was going on under that composed mask of his. Perhaps he was thinking? My Father was a wise man - but one of few words. Even when he argued, he spoke little, but meaningfully.

Thinking before speaking was a vital habit of his.

"Have you heard of... Jack and the Beanstalk?" He asked at last.

I nodded shortly - yes. It was a famous historic tale. "He discovered a handful of Giant Beans and from there, grew a beanstalk which led to a Giant's lair. He climbed it, entered the lair, and stole from the Giant."

"Aye," My Father agreed. "The very one. He was the founder of this tradition - and our ancestor."

"Jack?"

The name sounded way to coincidental to just be plain coincidental. Jack and **Jack**ildophil. Gosh! My name was unoriginal! And I had thought Jackildophil was a rather special name at first!

The King seemed to have read my mind. "Yes, and your name - is Jack as well."

"My name? It is Jackildophil!" I protested. What was Father talking about? I was Jackildophil, I am Jackildophil, and I always would be Jackildophil. I was pretty sure that that was my name. I would know better!

"No," The King contradicted. "Your true name is Jack."

"Excuse me, Father?"

"My name is Jack too, and so was my Father, and my Grandfather - and generations and generations before that."

"Wait-"

"And so will your son's name be," The King finished softly. "Our line... is cursed."

My jaw dropped unceremoniously at the last statement. Our line was cursed? Oh come on, if it was cursed, I would have felt it by now. A handful of royal lines were cursed - usually by witches/fairy godmothers (they were the same thing). But not mine! This was certainly hard to believe.

Then I grew aware of my rather un-prince-like act, and proceed to close my mouth at once.

I wanted to argue with The King all day till I got my way, but I decided against it. Telling the King that he was wrong wasn't a very intelligent idea. And besides, it just felt like the wrong time to object.

So instead, I bombarded him with questions.

"Why is our line cursed, My Lord?" I asked quietly.

The King stared back gravely at me. It occurred to me that he was deliberating.

"Sleeping Beauty." He answered my question with another question. "Does it ring any bells?"

I tried to recall the historical lessons and the grueling essays which my tutor had forced me into doing. Sleeping Beauty... Her real name was Princess Astra or something... And she... And she was cursed by an...

"Evil Godmother!" I exclaimed triumphantly, before re-collecting my composure about me. "She was cursed by a witch upon birth."

As the King nodded, satisfied, I began to piece the puzzle pieces together once more. So our line was cursed? Had the very first Jack's kid had been cursed by an evil fairy godmother, a.k.a witch? This was horribly confusing.

And what exactly was the curse? I was dying to know. It affected ME after all.

But as far as The King was concerned, his 'Father and Son bonding time' was over. And it was time for me to leave his chamber. He had other important matters to get down to, and that included running his country.

"I apologize, My Son, but I have a counsel meeting in ten minutes," The King said as he glanced at his silver wrist watch. "I am afraid you have to ask your tutor the rest."

I performed a full body bow once more to acknowledge that I'd heed his request. My Father merely glanced once more in my direction before sweeping up his silky, bellowing robe and heading to the doorway.

Unconsciously, I found myself observing him closely. He appeared weary - and... worried of something? What was it? It brought back memories of the time in which the news of my stepsister, Snow White's escapade with a foreign Prince had reached him.

"Until we meet again, Father," I whispered my farewell.

I turned and started to make my way on outside.

"Remember," The King said instead. "You are to embark on your mission in three days. I wish you luck."

I honestly didn't like the sound of that.


	2. Chapter 2

**~Chapter 2: Captured by a Witchy-Prince?~**

**MOONTEL'S POV**

Time to feed the Prisoner~

The rays of the sweltering noontime sun blasted through the gaps in my magical barrier. Oh... damn. We witches had a horrid affair with the sun. So you see, as the dirty-yellowed cold rays shot my lower arm, they immediately sent shivers ricocheting through my entire body.

I immediately jolted my hand away, and back into the gloom. I would touch up on the barrier later, but for now, I'd better proceed to feeding my Prisoner.

Golly! If she died on my watch, that certainly would speak rather badly of which me. And besides, My Mistress, Gothal might decide to neglect my apprenticeship altogether! I couldn't have that! I was already on my way to becoming a _decent_ witch! - no, not a silly magician- A REAL WICKED WITCH! So I'd better carry out my duties well, mostly consisted of cleaning the kilometer-tall tower, and ensuring our prisoner's survival.

"Rapunzel?" I called, trying to sound as menacing as possible. "Your lunch's ready!"

From the locked interior of the room, Rapunzel produced a muffled whine.

"About time!" She sniffed in self-pity. "My poor hungry stomach is getting the better of me!"

I rolled my eyes. Then without a second thought, I picked the lock stealthily and rammed the door open. The moment I entered, the stench of royal blood caught my nose. I wheezed helplessly. Ewww... Stupid Princesses and Princes. Their blood smelt like cockroach poo to us Witches.

There Rapunzel sat, air headed as usual. Playing with her long golden locks while humming an insanely dreamy tune. Something about a Handsome Prince riding a Majestic White Stallion - coming to rescue her from this desolate tower.

Fat Hope. No one was going to break her out - not on my watch at least.

I tried to get that idea across to her. "If any fool of a Prince comes knocking, I'll turn him into a toad!" I warned.

Rapunzel shivered upon hearing this. "You will not dare! He will... spear you through with a sword."

"You think? He'll be a toad, girl! Toads can't hold swords!"

I grinned evilly at my success. Fine, I did lie, my magic wasn't even that advanced yet. In fact, I didn't think witches had that sort of power in the first place. But still... Gloating was cool.

"Eat up!" I commanded. "I'll bring the tray down for you."

"I will take my own sweet time!" Rapunzel pouted instead. I scowled at her, but I was powerless. Right, I knew she was technically MY prisoner, but she acted all princess-sy. Sometimes, I did feel like her personal servant.

I was beginning to understand why Princess Snow White hated her to the depths of hell and beyond.

"A Prince _will_ rescue me anyhow," Rapunzel was insisting to herself. "And a jolly handsome one-"

Speak of the devil. I felt it. The first grade protection charms my Mistress and I had painstakingly put to place began tingling. It sensed something. It couldn't be another silly Prince, could it? - it's presence was way too deadly... But wait! It also detected the thin whiff of Royal Blood! Was it... really a Prince?

The vibes the charm was sending me was getting stronger now. My Mistress should definitely have felt this wave. I hoped she would hurry back in a flurry. She usually left for a few days in a row.

"Business," she would say - but when I asked 'What?', she would coldly turn her nose up to me. So... I had no clue how to contact her.

I was on my own. It was reassuring to know that there was only a single way of entering or leaving this tower. That was: Through climbing Rapunzel's hair. A Prince couldn't possibly fly, could he? He was clearly human - an easy prey, and a good opportunity to prove myself to My Mistress. Ah... yes, I would quickly take care of him. Scare him off with a crude conjuring charm or something.

I turned. "Don't you dare let down your hair to anyone, girl!" I addressed Rapunzel sternly.

Rapunzel stuck out her tongue at me obstinately.

"I'm serious!" I scowled. "I'll have you properly punished," - slammed and locked Rapunzel's door- "if," -rummaged through one of the ga-jillion locked cupboards- "you- AH-CHOO!"

Oh gosh! The dust accumulation was CRAZY! Rapunzel sought to tearing and fanning herself lady-likely with her hands. It made me snicker to see her this way, but the dust was blinding me as well. So the moment my eyes were set on the first magically ancient broomstick, I stuck with it.

"You hear me girl?"

-snort-.

I rolled my eyes and turned my attention back to the broomstick. Frankly, I wasn't confident with one. But this would have to do. Climbing down Rapunzel's hair was too long and tedious. Besides, I also trusted an ogre more than I trusted her.

Hurriedly, I hauled out a specially made sun-proof robe and forced it on. Stupid Sun.

"You'd better listen to my advice!" I screamed my final warning, before taking off into the breezy skies.

Yuksyuksyuksyuksyuks, the sun couldn't touch me, but I still felt less than uncomfortable. Bloody Prince, he'd better make my effort worthwhile.

Something tugged at the lower pit of my stomach. The sensation was similar to constipation. Oh great. Some dope with royal blood was attempting to summon me. When a Prince or Princess tried to summon a Witch, it's best you listened, or you'll get some major cramps and headaches. As for me, I was barely even a quarter-fledged witch yet, so the need to answer the summoning was not so severe.

The broomstick suddenly plunged, and I stifled a shriek. I had to will it with all my mind to get back on track, but 'The Summoning' was really throwing my thoughts into a frenzied mess.

So to keep a long story short, basically, I nose dived and ended up stuck in a thistle bush with a freaking sword pressed to my throat.

All I had in mind was that: Good thing that sun-proof robe stuck on.

"I supposed you did manage to escape my summoning," a boy's voice drawled icily from above. "But now- just surrender."

He had an upper class accent. He mentioned 'Summoning'. And he stunk of cockroach poo. A stupid Prince, he was.

I looked in the direction of my foe. He wasn't more than eighteen. Tall and lean he was, with superior features which spat "I AM KING". Undoubtedly, he was handsome, but his eyes were so frosty that they threatened to turn me into icicles.

Geez, chill dude. I'm the one that should be mad, not you. I was the one in a sticky situation.

I'd play weak, I decided, then attack him when his back was turned.

"If you could... remove your sword?" I stammered hopefully. "I'm... just a girl."

"I'm not stupid," He replied coldly. I shivered at his tone.

"But.." he continued quietly. "If you promise- I mean swear, to stay by my side at all times, and _not_ to attack me- I shall."

"No!" I instantly protested.

Witches lie all the time. But when they swear upon a pact or deal which is sealed by dark-royal magic, they CANNOT break it. The last one that did so got pecked to death by a gaggle of geese, so you see, Dark Pacts were not to be toyed with. That's one horrid way untameable Wicked Witches end up as obedient Fairy Godmothers.

"Sunlight..." He threatened softly. "Your protective robe..."

It didn't take me long to figure he was going to throw me out into the sun if I turned him down. I didn't have much of a choice. Damn.

"Your name?" I asked reluctantly.

He hesitated, side-glancing me suspiciously. He was a smart one, he was. For those who trifled with magic, real names were truly important. You didn't go randomly distributing your true name around...

"Jackodophil," He finally relented.

I nodded. "Jackodophil," I repeated, but I couldn't taste the magic within it. It was a fraud name - to disguise one's true one.

"I need your real name, Lad," I explained irritably. "If not the pact won't work!"

He stared back at me expressionlessly. There was not a trace of evidence to show what he was thinking about. Gosh! this guy was literally a piece of walking stone!

"Jack."

"Jack what?" I demanded.

"Elmstake," He scowled. "Jack. Elmstake."

Elmstake. So he was a Prince after all. And one of a Majestic Kingdom too. But wait... I sniffed. The smell of his blood - yes, it was royal, but I smelt the sweet smell of witchy-blood in his veins as well...?

"_Hurry_."

I bit my lip, drawing in a sharp intake of breath.

"_I, Moontel, swear upon the royal name of... Jack Elmstake, to... er.. stick by his side? and.. not to kill him?_"

Dark magic coiled themselves round the words - and the pact was done. It looked simple, but it was powerful. That was how Cinderella's Fairy Godmother got trapped as one in the first place. She used to be a Wicked Witch. I _used_ to respect her. But now... How Disgraceful!

The Prince nodded and removed his sword from my throat. I helped myself out of the thistle bush as he stepped away ungentlemanly. I stared at him, and he analysed me in return.

At last, The Prince spoke.

"Now," He said ruthlessly. "I shall summon your Mistress. If everything goes according to plan, I will free you both. If not... _Both_ shall pay _dearly_."

_WHAT_? WHAT WAS HE UP TO?


	3. Chapter 3

**~Chapter 3: Royal Blood Circle~**

**JACK'S POV**

What a surprise!

The girl was fairer than I... But, but the Royal family of _Elmstakes_ were known as fairest folks of the land! - with my stepsister, Snow White supposedly the fairest of us all. Well, I supposed the title didn't include Witches. Because one look at her awfully perfect complexion and I knew she was unbeatable. Never in her life had she spent a minute basking under the sun.

Okay, I admit it. I was jealous.

Bedtimes stories twisted reality. Witches weren't ugly hags with bottles of chopped lizards. They were far from that.

The girl jolted me out of my thoughts by pushing me furiously backwards. That jerk!

"You're summoning My Mistress?" She demanded persistently. "And why? Tell me _now_! WHY?"

Why? - I allowed myself a smirk. I _needed_ to find a set of Giant's Beans of course. I _needed _to prove myself. After all, the folks in my Kingdom were already accusing me of having a "Witch" for a Mother. They'd said that Snow White should be the true heir, and not I. She hadn't any Witchy-Blood, but I had. They called me evil; They called me incapable; They moaned over Snow White's escapade.

My tutor had told me that ALL giants dwelled in the skies, and the only way to reach them was to find the special set of beans which grew and led to a specific Giant. These beans were indestructible, so to prevent nosy humans from stumbling upon and looting their lair, these Giants hid their set of beans. Hid them in the darkest and deepest most depths of the Earth.

My duty was to find any set of Giant's Beans. And according to rumours, the Wicked Witch, Gothal knew of the hiding place of one. She wasn't called a 'Wicked' Witch for nothing. The thing was - wringing the info out of her.

I was halfway there already.

Witchy-girl jabbed me angrily. "Hey! Why're you summoning her?"

"I _prefer_ to keep the reasons to myself."

She just refused to suck it up. Insolent fool!

"But I _prefer_ to know, so you'd better tell me!"

I ignored her and studied the previous blood circle which I had used in attempt to summon this Witchy-Girl. My blood had already begun drying up. Using this again for another summoning would be like dancing precariously at the edge of a cliff. It was too risky. Besides, Gothal was a Wicked Witch with a _Bloody_ reputation.

Sighs. I would just have to do it again.

Gingerly, I sliced a thin vein on my lower arm with my hand dagger, before moving widdershins - forming a closed circle with my own blood. _Fresh_ Royal Blood - ah... yes. It was a witch's bane. It seared their delicate flesh like the sun; its smell repulsed them; and it was fatal poison to a witch if consumed. I hoped this was enough to keep that dangerous witch in.

I made sure that it had no gaps, before I willed the witch Gothal to appear before me. Good thing I knew her true name at the tip of my tongue. It was important for The Summoning.

The idiotic girl had to yank me backwards.

"It's rude to summon a witch!" Moontel shrieked, upset. "We've better things to do than help a silly Prince do some silly chores! Stop-"

Great riddance! I hadn't the time to entertain her with a debate! My blood would dry - then the protective barrier would be as good as useless!

And then, the witch, Gothal answered to my Summoning at last. The air around us visibly frosted over, and wisps of coldness shrouded the forest. It was a sign that something deadly was approaching fast.

"Gothal," I greeted boldly. "Ah... we meet again."

A woman, mind you, a gorgeous one, materialized before me with a tiny little black cat curled comfortably around the top of her head. The cat hissed at me furiously - and I understood it!

"How dare you!" It snarled menacingly. "You _will_ pay."

Thank goodness both were safely bound in the blood circle.

I felt the woman's raw anger from where I was standing. But as most sly creatures of the dark, she replaced that effortlessly with an overly sweet smile. I knew better than to believe that. Once this Summoning ended, she would begin tracking me to the depths and ends of the Earth. I had better keep my guard up.

"Your Highness," The witch acknowledged. "It is foolish to tame me so! Surely, you know of my reputation?"

I nodded, forcing my features to remain calm. "I do. I have no intention to tame you. I have instead... a request."

"Oh?"

"Now-"

"My Lord," The witch interrupted. "I cannot hear you clearly. Do take a few steps forward."

"Nonsense!" I snapped.

It was a trick! How devious! As long as my royal blood didn't dry, the witch was bound helplessly within the circle. But one step past, and...

I was as good as dead duck meat.

Then Moontel shoved me forward!

I stumbled forward, but fortunately for me, I regained my balance just before I overstepped the boundaries. My eyes flew open with horror - The girl tried to kill me! But how? The pact...

I instinctively swiveled around and grabbed her. Perhaps a bit to roughly, but I couldn't care less. I was erupting with anger. Moontel whimpered with shock, but I only tightened my grip harder, and lifted my sword with a deft motion to her throat.

Her eyes widened momentarily. So did her Mistress's from within the circle.

"The pact," I demanded. "How can you?"

Moontel's eyes glinted with devilishness. "My intention was not to kill you, but to scare you-"

So the contract was void. Devious - witches were. The girl had simply outsmarted the pact. I should have worded the details better... Man, she was still a great threat to me.

"My apprentice!" Gothel was asking apprehensively from within the circle. "What is she doing with _you_?"

The cat meowed angrily at me. "Let her go!"

I reminded myself to take deep breaths.

"Let us keep this simple," I said confidently. "I have _your_ apprentice, and you have _my_ information."

"And what exactly is that information?"

I half-smiled. "The location of a set of Giant's Beans," I informed her. "And do not dare lie. Moontel's life is in your hands."

The witch's jaw dropped even further on my uncanny knowledge of her apprentice's real name. It was a weapon that could be used against her now. I could tell that this witch truly cared about her apprentice. I had made the right decision by taking Moontel hostage. Awesome.

I smirked.

The witch cleared her throat defeatedly. I had won.

"In the Kingdom of Far-far Away," The Witch replied reluctantly.

The Far-Far Away Kingdom? That was my stepsister, Snow White's Kingdom! She had run off with a daft Prince to that Kingdom after my Mother had 'died' in the attempt to kill her.

"Where exactly in Far-Far Away?" I questioned curiously.

"Guarded by a Monstrous Dragon." The witch hesitated. "At the East of Mount Saphial."

The cat scowled furiously at me. I was starting to hate the cat.

Moontel made a choking noise at the mention of this mountain. It occurred to me there and then that this girl knew that place. For sure. Maybe I could bring her along... against her will...

"Anything else you need to know, My Lord?" The Witch asked again pleasantly. Too pleasant to be real. I smelt a very big rat. Something was definitely wrong.

Realization slammed into me like a ton of bricks! Of course! My 'Blood Summoning Circle' was drying and crusting up. In a second or two, the witch would be free to slit my throat! And mind you, I'm guessing she's extremely eager to finish me. That'd probably be the first thing she got down to.

So I concentrated intensely on willing her away. She was a powerful witch though, and put up a great deal of resistance.

In fact, I began to wonder if it was too late - and all hope was lost-, when the witch threw back her head and howled furiously like an injured wolf, before disappearing in a puff of dust.

Success!

Victory was mine!


End file.
